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FAMILIES OF PEACE

June 16, 2023

Chaos runs rampant in our homes, churches, and nation. At times it appears that order is nowhere to be found. The war we fight overwhelms us with casualties it leaves behind. In the desolation, we search desperately for the return of our hope and peace. Peace is quite misunderstood in our culture. We mistake passivity for peace and believe no peace can exist where suffering resides. Yet, the opposite is true. Peace is not simply a lack of conflict, the passive way we avoid speaking the truth, or the quiet tension that radiates through churches, homes, marriages, and friendships. We often live under the delusion that we have peace because we are not at war with anyone presently. Maybe we’re under the impression that the peace of God cannot pierce through the current trial we’re enduring. Genuine peace is only experienced through the presence of God, the Holy Spirit manifesting himself to us (John 14:26-27). 

Where God’s presence is, there is peace. We encounter God’s manifest presence when God reveals Himself to us (Matthew 3:17). 

This is the peace we desire radiating in our lives, in our homes, and in our churches. What exactly stands in our way of having families of peace? Perhaps selfishness and pride, self-righteousness and fear come to mind. Perhaps grief, addiction, depression, and divorce are at the forefront of your mind. Scripture says this about peace: “seek peace and pursue it” (Psalm 34:14) and to “let the peace of God rule in your hearts” (Colossians 3:15). How can we do this when our flesh stands in the way? To build families of peace, we first must know how to have peace in our own minds. God gives us many ways peace can guard our minds through prayer and supplication with gratitude (Philippians 4:6-7), by keeping our minds and hearts focused on Him (Isaiah 26:3, Colossians 3:2), and being spiritually minded instead of following our own understanding (Romans 8:6, Proverbs 3:5-6). Practically, meditate on God and the things of God above the troubles, fears, and selfish desires. Practice gratitude to God for the blessings you do have. Follow the leading of the Spirit to guide your steps in making decisions. When the battle in our mind rages due to traumatic experiences and grief becomes paralyzing, peace can still be found (John 14:18). We are not without comfort, peace, and hope (Romans 15:13,Exodus 14:14, John 16:33, I Peter 1:6-8). 

“I. . .beseech you that ye walk worthy. . . endeavoring to keep the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.” (‭‭Ephesians‬ ‭4‬:‭1‬-‭3‬ shortened). Peace is not something we can experience without intention. Peace in our relationships and with our families is also not without effort. God calls us to be “peacemakers”, the ones who go into the conflict to create peace, to find resolution, and to restore to God’s design (Matthew 5:9) Of course it’s much easier to retreat, shut down, and avoid any sign of confrontation against sin or personal trespass with someone we love. If we follow this path, we will not experience the genuine peace of God. Hebrews 12:14 and Romans 12:18 share a similar command for us in seeking peace within our relationships: to follow after and live peaceably with all men. Following this command leads down a path different from what you may expect. It begins with

exalting the Word of God above our opinions. It leads to following the “peacemaker” lifestyle and diligently practicing grace, truth, mercy, and love. Whether the relationship we’re pursuing peace with is a marriage, a sibling relationship, or a parent-child relationship, there’s several commands that give us general guidelines. “Repay no man evil for evil” “Rejoice with them that rejoice, weep with those that weep”. (Romans 12:17-21). “Speak the truth in love”. “Put away lying and speak to every man truth. . .” “Let all bitterness and wrath. . . Be put away from you. . . Be kind to one another. . . “ (Ephesians 4:15-32) “Whosoever shall compel thee to go a mile, go with him twain” (Matthew 5:38-48). “If thy brother trespass against thee, go and tell him. . . (Matthew 18:15-20). “Forgiving one another. . . Put on charity. . .” (Colossians 3:12-17.) These and many more give us commands to obey if we are seeking peace in our home. When we follow these and act on them, we are walking as a peacemaker and the “bond of peace” will cover us. ​

The time has come to build homes radiating peace!

Arise and build your family of peace. Don’t allow chaos to overtake your loved ones. Seek the presence of God daily and walk out the peace that guards and stabilizes us in the troubles of life. The time has come to build homes radiating peace. 

Marriage – Building Peace

  1. Emotional Bank Account: Make “deposits” into your spouse’s “bank account” regularly (Ephesians 5:22-23, I Peter 3:7)
  2. Trust: Seek to keep the “bond of unity” (Ephesians 4:2-3). Integrity and faithfulness are staples of a healthy marriage. (Proverbs 11:3, 12:22). 
  3. Communicate: Just as prayer is a key in our relationship with our Heavenly Father, communication is vital for a marriage of peace. Put away “filthy communication” and put on “mercy, kindness, humbleness of mind, meekness, longsuffering, forgiveness, and charity” (Colossians 3:8-19)

Parenting – Protecting Peace 

  1. Model Spiritual Growth: Continue to grow in grace and knowledge of Jesus, model what a walk with God looks like (II Peter 1:5-9, II Peter 3:18, Matthew 5:16)
  2. Model Conflict Resolution: Practice biblical and healthy ways to handle conflict and practicing repentance and forgiveness (Matthew 18:15-16, Colossians 3:13 Romans 12:9-, etc)
  3. Model Healthy expression of emotions: Humbly submit yourself (and your emotions) to God and seek His guidance in navigating uncomfortable and distressing emotions. (I Peter 5:6-10, James 4:7-10)

Trauma – Renovation of Peace

  1. Find security in your identity and Character of God. Develop understanding of the everlasting character of God and the identity He has given to you (Hebrews 13:8, Ephesians 2:10).
  2. Find purpose in life: Seek ways to serve God faithfully and others in love (Galatians 5:13-14, I Samuel 12:24) 
  3. Feed your Faith with fervency in prayer and thanksgiving to God.  (Philippians 4:6-7) 

Addiction – Peaceful Remodel

  1. Surround yourself with a healthy support system. It helps to fight these battles with assistance. Ecclesiastes 4:9-12, Hebrews 13:6
  2. Seek out biblical discipleship to learn to walk in the light from a spiritual mentor. 
  3. With biblical counsel, seek opportunities that provide purpose in life. Walk out what it means to “Love the Lord with all your heart, soul, mind and strength”.  Jer 1:5, Matthew 22:37-38

Emotional Wholeness – A Peace that Surpasses Understanding

  1. Practice meditation on scripture and truth in God’s Word. Remember His promises, His character, and Our Identity in Christ.  Isaiah 26:3 
  2. Remember to Rest. True rest is found in the presence of Jesus. Use prayer, worship, study, prayer walks, fellowship with biblical community to practice biblical rest. Matthew 11:28-30
  3. The things in this world can easily cause discouragement. Be filled with the Holy Spirit through song/psalms, speaking to yourself with biblical truth, service to another, and practicing gratitude and thanksgiving. Each of these help to change our perspective on the current circumstances. Ephesians 5:18-21, Galatians 5:22-23 
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